We asked writers to coin terms for all the emotions we didn't have words for. Like, for example, 'nocturnal admissions'
Illustration: Zohar Lazar This week, the Cut is exploring a scientific theory that suggests we have infinite emotions, so long as we can name them — and so we did, asking writers to identify new ways to feel.
Nocturnal Admissions: The insidious feelings of self-recrimination that take over your brain during states of middle-of-the-night semi-consciousness, when normal psychological defenses against despair are disabled. It’s three-something in the morning again. I’ve just stirred awake, but one program associated with consciousness has failed to load: a kind of psychic antivirus protection without which I’m vulnerable to pernicious, even sadistic, doubts.
Stuff like, You know your novel? It sucks. Or: You’re probably going to die young. What they say carries a strange weight, the force of irrefutable prophecy. Nobody who knows you really likes you. If they do, it’s only because you’ve fooled them; they’ll catch on. You’re washed up. Maybe you had talent once, but you frittered away. Too much drinking and smoking. First it comes for your brain, then for your body. That headache you had the other day? Minor stroke. You never even learned Latin.
Night terrors take place in sleep; the insomniac’s churning anxiety prevents sleep, and the dark night of the soul is a form of spiritual crisis. Nocturnal admissions are distinct. They come after the system has been shut down, but before everything is back online — like when the electric fences aren’t working at Jurassic Park.
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