Susan Orlean on the crazy things people ask a librarian, from ‘The Library Book’

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Susan Orlean on the crazy things people ask a librarian, from ‘The Library Book’
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'Why would someone call here and ask, ‘Which is more evil, grasshoppers or crickets?''

TheThe opposite of a sensory-deprivation tank might be to spend a Monday morning in the library’s. The phone rings with that weird blooping electronic tone all day long, and the staff of five reference librarians answer, ping-ponging from topic to topic so widely that just sitting among them and listening makes your brain feel rubbery.

The librarian beside Brenner, Harry Noles, said, “Oh, and there’s that guy who calls every few months to get updates on Dana Delany, the actress from that showPrincenthal hung up her phone and wrote something down. “Sometimes I’m amazed by what people call about,” she said, tapping her desk with a pencil. “Once, a patron called to ask if it was okay for her to eat a can of beans that didn’t have an expiration date.

“Last week a lady called and asked me how to sign a card for a baby shower,” Princenthal said. “I mean, that’s not exactly something to look up. I just said, ‘How about … “Best wishes”? Or … “Congratulations”?’ Just off the top of my head. I didn’t consult any source. She seemed happy with that answer.” She then added, “There are a lot of lonely people out there.”

“Not everyone has the Internet or knows how to use it,” Noles said. “Hello, InfoNow?” Pause. “Say the title again?“You’re getting an error message on your e-media download?” Paquinelli asked into his phone. “Hold on a moment.”

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