It has eight saunas, pools that bubble like LaCroix, a sexy waterfall, volcanic sand in which to get buried, nap rooms, bulgogi rice bowls, and intense scrub treatments that leave you buttery and renewed
Photo-Illustration: by Stevie Remsberg; Photos: Getty SoJo Spa Club is a 140,000-square foot Korean spa playground spread over four floors in Edgewater, New Jersey. . People make pilgrimages to bathe in these carbon-rich waters. At SoJo, you will hear every language, see every type of body, and bump into every variety of Jersey boyfriend in the book. It’s ridiculously fun.
What to bring: ID. Sunscreen. Swimsuit A book. A change of clothes. Preferred toiletries, although they also have soaps in the shower stalls in the locker rooms, plus hair dryers. A deep moisturizer! Most important: An empty water bottle, airport-style. There are many water fountains, and you sweat so much you need to be chugging the stuff.
Before your scrub, you blanch yourself in a hot tub for 30 minutes, then go back to a cubicle in the Bath House and get naked . I was scrubbed from between my toes to behind my ears and even my belly button by a woman named Gina wearing hot pink slippers. It hurt when she scrubbed my elbows and knees; the rest felt wonderful. When Gina flipped me over, she pulled by bikini bottom into an atomic wedgie so she could scrub my butt cheeks. Then she lovingly pulled it back out.
SoJo’s Hinoko bath Photo: Courtesy of SoJo Spa Club The silk bath: I call this the cream soda bath. It’s milky-looking and slightly fizzy. I sat and read about Jack Reacher beating up some guys for a bit in this one, hoping for the “state of the art Japanese white ionisation technology” to improve my skin elasticity and nourish the hell out of me.
Fifth Floor The far-infrared sauna: The not-as-hot one, it’s 132 degrees Fahrenheit in here. There’s a view of Trader Joe’s parking lot. You can sit in front of some slats while infrared rays hopefully maybe increase your oxygen flow and generally detoxify your toxic self.
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