Teens need to be able to trust, without a doubt, that their parents have their back no matter what.
As a teenager, I spent much of my time hiding. If it went against the grain of society, I kept my desire to do or be it under lock and key., weight loss, and perfection at any cost, all while neatly tucking away the messiest parts of myself. I pushed down any natural personality trait that seemed unpleasing to others. And I stayed quiet while enduring mental, emotional, and physical abuse during much of my childhood years.
What I would have given to have a grown up in my life who I felt truly safe to be my most authentic self around.the teen years . My dad often kept his own uncomfortable emotions hidden away, thus perpetuating fear in me of ever showing him mine. And he had his head buried so deeply in his job that sincere connection was far to come by. If I was off my game for a performance or school test, he’d challenge my overachiever status by pointing out where I screwed up. And then he’d compare me to my little sister who was struggling academically, which only made me feel more pressure to get an A+ all the goddamn time.
It’s overwhelming enough to experience the life-altering transition of becoming a teen, let alone grapple with mental health struggles and the vulnerable journey to self-identity. My stepchild is encountering all three of these challenges at once. In an ideal world, she’d be able to face the obstacle of teenage-hood knowing she will always be seen, heard, supported, and accepted by every parental figure in her life.
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