Opinion | Lily Burana: 'Working out one’s personal style should be fun, not fraught, and sometimes you have to let your kid just be a kid.' - NBCNewsTHINK
My daughter, who recently turned five, has a best friend at our military post preschool named Alvaro. Alvie, I noticed, has taken to sitting on the classroom’s alphabet carpet for Morning Meeting wearing cargo shorts, a superhero T-shirt, and glittery silver sneakers with lavender laces; sometimes he wears a hot pink zip-front hoodie.
Nobody cares. None of the other kids make fun of him. The teachers never comment, and I’ve not heard so much as a peep from another parent — even though the military, as a social milieu, falls on the traditional side. Alvie’s doing Alvie, and it’s no big deal. My daughter sees Alvie as a fashion inspiration, in that he shows her she can dress how she likes. . At Target the other day, she asked for sneakers just like Alvie’s. I’m glad they’re sharing a robust friendship and fashion-forward looks.
And, more than anything, I’m glad Alvie's mom stands by him. I've seen how important that can be: I have another friend, the matriarch of a deeply religious family stationed in Texas, whose 6-year-old son wears nail polish to school every day. He’d been doing it for a year before another kid teased him because it’s something “for girls.” His mother assures him that’s not true: It’s something for everyone who wants it.
Like most people, I’m not a proponent of obliterating gender, but I am an advocate for expanding our concept of how diverse it can be. There is life beyond the binary, and aesthetic freedom beyond the borders of pink for girls and blue for boys. I support allowing kids to explore, experiment, and blur the boundaries. Working out one’s personal style should be fun, not fraught. As parents, we can encourage kids in taking chances and developing preferences.
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