We hate narcissists. Listicles describe life with them as a psychological war zone, explaining how to spot them and fight back. On narctok, the final stage of enlightenment is “no contact.” But what if a little narcissism is okay? HannaRosin writes
suggests someone who got stuck in an infantile phase because they didn’t get enough love, then spent their life in a desperate and futile attempt to regain it. But in practice, Kohut found this approach formulaic and cold, crushing of his creative spirit. “Kohut deeply objected to the idea that narcissism, or any form of self absorption, is necessarily bad,” Strozier writes.
Kohut died suddenly of leukemia at 49, and Kernberg, a rival scholar of narcissism, took on the word. Kernberg’s darker view informed Christopher Lasch’s 1979 book, which warned of a coming generation obsessed with fame and celebrity. Lasch’s predictions were alarmingly correct, but his tone was unnecessarily dire. He predicted that, much like a borderline patient, all of us staring at a flickering screen would start to feel our “amorphous existence to be futile and purposeless.
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