“I cared about how I looked, but I’d never had the time or money to care consistently enough to expect good results. Now, suddenly, I had both, and I was beginning to think of T as a good example of how I ought to spend them”
Photo-Illustration: by Stevie Remsberg; Photos Getty In 2008 the U.S. economy was collapsing, but I myself was experiencing a brief and temporary period of financial abundance, the first and only time like this I have ever known. After years of working at office jobs that barely allowed me breathing time on the weekends, I was fully freelance, or as I would later come to think of it, unemployed.
In my earlier 20s, I’d treated my body mostly as an impediment or an afterthought. My clothes were often from thrift stores, less fashion statement and more matter of expediency. I cared about how I looked, but I’d never had the time or money to care consistently enough to expect good results. Now, suddenly, I had both, and I was beginning to think of T as a good example of how I ought to spend them.
But shopping with T was different. When she walked into a store, the employees greeted her by name and began to pull items from the racks for her to try on. Riding her coattails, I was treated with the same consideration, which is how I wound up owning a beautiful cashmere 3.1 Philip Lim sweater that I had no use for and rarely wore, and which was eventually eaten by moths in my closet.
If getting T’s advice on who to pay for haircuts and sweaters was rare, getting advice on how to get paid for writing about them was impossible. She never introduced me to her editors or in any other way helped me learn how to live the way she did. I resented her for this; sharing that kind of information freely has always been my instinctive way, for better and worse. But I was wrong to feel resentful. Not only couldn’t she have helped me, she probably didn’t even realize that I needed help.
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