A letter writer is confused by invited guests not knowing what “RSVP” means — and showing up to a reception without responding.
I am a retired physician from an academic medical center, and I continue to teach interested residents. I led a weekly seminar for senior residents last year. They worked very hard, and at the end of the year, my wife and I invited them to a reception at our home. The invitations included an RSVP. Very few responded, but they all showed up!
I asked them why they had not responded, and the majority of these highly educated fifth-year residents — who have all completed college and four years of medical school — did not know the meaning of “RSVP!”medical schools and medical residencies do not teach “RSVP” does not surprise Miss Manners.
That said, she confesses to a dislike for the term “RSVP” — especially when it is used as a noun or verb, and when it is rendered in capital letters instead of, properly, “R.s.v.p.” Why are we using a French acronym? Why can’t we just say “Please respond?” Perhaps then, your students would have understood. Whether they would have answered is another matter.Even though compression socks are uncomfortable, I wear them when flying to prevent medical issues. Putting them on at home before I leave for the airport adds at least three hours of discomfort.
My brother responded coldly to our proposed changes. His response was along the lines of “You have your style and I have mine.” We obviously hurt his feelings, and in hindsight, I wish we had simply rubber-stamped the project. What would have been the appropriate way to handle this situation? And should we now apologize? He hasn’t spoken to us since, but he may just be busy.Miss Manners has learned that “Tell me your honest opinion” is seldom an honest request.
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