DEAR MISS MANNERS: My fiance and I are slowly planning a wedding to take place next year. ... Is there any way to express to our guests that we will not be registering for gifts, and not make it sound like a cash grab?
DEAR MISS MANNERS: My fiance and I are slowly planning a wedding to take place next year. We are very lucky to have large families and many friends.
It seems that in this case, it’s lose-lose: With a gift registry, you are asking for gifts, but without one, it seems like you are asking for cash. We don’t want to communicate either of those things to our guests. I know of no such picayune dictates regarding card placement in envelopes, and feel that my neighbor is being petty.GENTLE READER: The mystery is why people who rudely criticize other’s manners are so often ignorant of the rules. Unsolicited instruction is a not picayune matter, because it taints etiquette by representing it as rudeness.
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