I Thought I Was Helping My Sister When I Reported Our Parents. She Doesn’t Agree.

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I Thought I Was Helping My Sister When I Reported Our Parents. She Doesn’t Agree.
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Dear Care and Feeding: After years apart, I’m shocked by what she thinks of me.

First of all, you didn’t fail your sister. You, as a very young person, took action to try and get the two of you out of harm’s way. It’s not your fault that your sister has had a rough time in foster care. It’s an unfortunate reality for many kids, but it is not you who caused this situation. Your parents had you living under dangerous circumstances and you had every right to advocate for the two of you.

That said, it may take your sister some time to get past her resentment. It’s not clear from your letter if she’s in immediate danger , but I’m guessing you would have said that if so. Assuming she’s stable and safe where she is now, you should continue to try and talk to her, letting her know just how much you love her and that you want to provide her with a better quality of life.

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