“I Now Pronounce You … With ADHD.”

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“I Now Pronounce You … With ADHD.”
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'It started with little things. Why couldn’t he be on time? Why couldn’t I keep the house clean? Why was I so emotional? Why did he stay up all night playing video games? When our first child arrived, things heated up.'

. I felt as if my mind were a mirror being sprayed with Windex for the first time. I could see. I could reach toward and achieve goals. I could enjoy my kids.

After a couple of months of joint therapy, I saw the counselor alone. She said that many of the things Justin and I were dealing with were “quirks” that came with “brilliance.” I raised my hand as if I were a third-grader.

“I don’t like being diagnosed in my absence,” said Justin. I didn’t expect him to. However, I had the tools I needed to make things better. If I needed him to do something, I wrote it down. I set alarms on my phone to remind him. If we had to be somewhere on time, I would say we had to be there 30 minutes earlier. He would laugh, always forgetting I’d done this before.

I whispered hallelujahs and raised my hands in victory. He had finally realized that his struggles at work could not be solved simply by working harder. He understood — without my having to nag him — that he had a treatable condition.

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