How to Create a Resilient, Divorce-Proof Relationship

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How to Create a Resilient, Divorce-Proof Relationship
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Resilience in a relationship is the ability to bounce back and recover after difficult experiences—and it's a skill that couples can learn together. Here's how to get started.

is the ability to “bounce back” or recover after difficult experiences. There will always be challenges, hurts, misunderstandings, arguments, unmet needs, and mistakes. In a resilient marriage, you will face them and work through them together. Not all marriages can be resilient, but many that move to divorce might have been strengthened with these tips.

Resilient marriages take work and grit. There are no easy marriages. The alternative is to divorce. However, divorce is the permanent solution to what may be a temporary problem. When you made your marriage vows, you intended to work through the hard times. Now those hard times have arrived and you’re overwhelmed, angry, scared, or feeling hopeless. Before you make that call to the lawyer, and before you start Googling “divorce,” consider whether you can fix your relationship.

Infidelity can rock the foundation of your marriage. However, marriages can recover with your hard work and commitment. Acknowledge trust issues, if there are any, and talk about how to rebuild trust and how to cultivate mutual respect. With this approach, you are inviting your spouse to work together with you to repair your relationship. You can’t do it alone. You need to collaborate.

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