Giving your full attention to another person can enhance your relationships and boost your well-being. Here's how to get started.
The First Step: What Are Your Relationship Values?
Knowing your relationship values can help motivate you to show up more fully in relationships. Take a moment to reflect on these values-based questions.How do you act when you are at your best in these important relationships?How would being present impact these relationships?When it comes to relationships you can’t be mindful all of the time.
It’s normal to multitask or be distracted in day-to-day encounters with others. For example, I clean up the house while chatting on the phone with a friend, or my mind wanders to work when my partner is talking about the car getting repaired. But when I am distracted or stuck in my own head when a client or friend is bidding for connection, we both miss out.
Validation is one of the most powerful ways to be present with someone. When you practice validation, you show that you are present, that you care, and that you want to understand their experience. Try these six steps to deep validation that I’ve adapted from Dialectical Behavior— Be alert, awake and pay attention to the person you are with. Listen to what they are saying. Get out of your head and into the moment.— Paraphrase and repeat back what you are hearing from the person you are with.
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