“Your children will be gorgeous.”
.” Her work is devoted to shining light on the personal traumas caused by infertility and reproductive technology failures, which she has experienced herself.I spoke to Tsigdinos about her advice to people like me, who are trying to figure out just how far to go to get a kid. Our conversation has been condensed and edited for clarity.
Cheyna Roth: In my experience, there’s a huge push to keep going with IVF once you start. It’s so easy for these clinics to just be like, “OK. This didn’t work. We’re just going to schedule for your next round, and your next round, and your next round.” And it becomes so hard to get out of that cycle.
Pamela Mahoney Tsigdinos: It is emotionally traumatizing, and in fact, the diagnosis of infertility is considered one of the top three stressors. When you have a really significant diagnosis like infertility, it’s a form of death. For the very first time you realize your reproductive organs may not operate as they’re supposed to and that may never get fixed. It’s a real stunning realization. And unfortunately, the way the fertility clinics are set up is, they’re like a conveyor belt.
We agreed to sit down and go through an IVF orientation out of a sense of desperation, because we had done everything else possible. We did go through it—at that point we really started to bond with the idea of becoming parents. We were very successful at egg extraction. They were able to get quite a few from me. The eggs actually fertilized really nicely. They described our embryos as beautiful and said, So in that sense, you really truly become attached.
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