Mother's Day can be really hard on those grieving their moms, as well as for anyone who's lost a child or can't conceive. So here's some coping strategies for the holiday weekend ahead, such as 'giving her presence, even if you can't give her presents.'
I didn’t expect to be emotionally ambushed when I checked my email, but the subject lines sucker punched me without warning.And my favorite: “Don’t Forget Mom!”
“The first year after I lost my mom, I remember rolling my eyes at all the ads, deleting all the emails before I really read them, or changing the channel, and being like, ‘Will it ever end!’ ” said Jessica Buckley, 41, from Long Island, whose mother also died from cancer several years. And COVID-19 can exacerbate the pain in other ways. Kristin Bianchi, a licensed psychologist at the Center for Anxiety and Behavioral Change, told MarketWatch that the pandemic has made the grieving process feel “even lonelier.” Some people are still staying home and isolating because they are immunocompromised, or they live in areas where COVID cases and hospitalizations continue to climb.
“The discomfort and the sadness is going to stay, because you miss her. But you can counteract that physical loss by giving her presence, even if you can’t give her presents,” Allison Gilbert, grief expert and author of “Passed and Present: Keeping Memories of Loved Ones Alive,” told MarketWatch. So over the past few years, my family has sometimes returned to the beach where we made so many happy memories sipping Yoo-hoo, eating bagels and swimming out as far as we could before my mom would yell at us to stop tempting the riptides. Or we toast her with Baileys Irish Cream, one of her favorite adult beverages, and play her favorite songs by Wilco and the Shins, and swap stories about her.Rosekelly once got a tattoo of forget-me-not flowers to honor her mom.
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