“My baby loves the bath and I put him in ass/balls first”
Photo: DEA / BIBLIOTECA AMBROSIANA/De Agostini via Getty Images The bathroom is a mysterious place. What goes on inside varies for everyone, or maybe it doesn’t; we simply do not know. The question has prompted some discussion in the past, and I suspect it will continue to do so until we are all under 24-hour government surveillance, at which point the answers will be known by those with access to the government’s live feed.
“My baby loves the bath and I put him in ass/balls first,” offered one mother. She added, “Also, I’ve never heard of men entering on hands and knees.” “I’ve never heard of a man entering a tub that way either. It’s definitely not how my DH [Ed.: dear husband] has ever gotten into a bath,” writes another. “Your man is weird AF [Ed.: as fuck] if that’s how they get in the tub…” said yet another.
He continued, “I just feel like the balls are basically in the middle of the X, Y, and Z axes of the body and there’s no way to make them go anywhere last. Head, torso, balls, legs. No matter how you dunk a body in water the balls can’t be the last in.” But is there any medical reason to raise one’s balls above bathwater so they hit it last? I reached out to several urologists asking the balls question and, surprisingly to me but perhaps not surprisingly to you, at the time of writing I have not heard back from almost any of them.As Groucho Marx once said, “that’s the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard…”
For more insight into whether warm water hurts a baby’s testicles, my colleague Izzy Grinspan reached out to the person she knows best who was most recently a baby: her 5-year-old son, Joey. In response to the question, “Do you think baby boys don’t like baths because it’s too hot for their testicles?” Joey reportedly said, “What’s a testable?” Huh. Honestly, I mostly don’t know. Thank you, Joey.
Back to the BabyCenter post.
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