Advice from Annie Lane.
” the high school girl who wants to lose her virginity. I thought I might give a different perspective from a male point of view. I lost my virginity at far too young an age. At the time, I thought getting “experience” was the thing to do. When I met my future wife, she was a virgin, in her 20s.
It was exciting because it was with her and because I love her, but I realized that each time I gained experience, I gave away part of myself that I could never get back. What I lost was getting to experience the joys of learning about intimacy together with my wife. I’m not saying that “Teen” should be celibate, but if I had it to do over again, I would have waited.
The more I beg and cry, the more I feel like I am choking. I wish I could flip a switch and make everything right, but my wife is not easily convinced. Showing her my anger does not work; showing her my tearful emotions does not work. I cannot nor do I want to see any light of life past my daughter and wife.
No matter how much verbiage and intent she throws in my face, I refuse to give up. I love my wife until death do us part. I completely understand that there is not a universal answer to the following question.
If your wife is willing to work together and push through your issues, couples therapy is the right place to start. Every marriage has its peaks and valleys; through honest, open communication, perseverance and compromise, I am confident you can come out stronger on the other side, provided your wife is committed to doing so.Annie Lane offers common-sense solutions to everyday problems. She's firm, funny and sympathetic, echoing the style of her biggest inspiration, Ann Landers.
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