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I enjoyed and wholeheartedly agreed with your advice to “Discouraged Great Aunt,” who persistently invites her relatives to events and functions, which they attend only a fraction of the time. Relationships are a two-way street, and she sounds like a very thoughtful person. I have no idea what the makeup of her nephew’s family is, but if it’s anything like ours , I wanted to add that attending events can be a huge logistical challenge in a large family.
While my husband and I love being parents to so many children, attending events with so many people of varying ages in tow is an event in and of itself. Our usual obligations -- church, school, daily chores and meals, etc. -- take more time and thought than when we had a smaller family, so we don’t attend as many extraneous events as we used to, or take off on a whim to visit family and friends as we may have done in the past.
I’ve told family and friends that our idea of a good time spent with family now is getting together in our backyard with a pitcher of lemonade to watch the kids play, or meeting halfway between cities at a playground or for a picnic, etc. I love it when a grandparent says, “I’ll be in the area soon. Can I come for supper and bring pizza?” The little things that don’t take much money or effort matter so much to us.
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