Coming out at work when you can’t dodge personal questions forever

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Coming out at work when you can’t dodge personal questions forever
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Workplace advice: Keeping your personal life hidden from coworkers can exact an emotional toll.

“He’s talented but antisocial,” the business owner said of his accounting manager when he called. “At first, we thought the problem was that “Gene” was a finance type and kind of a geek. But there have been odd comments from others over the last two years.”

When we met, both masked, I asked about his background, career goals and thoughts about the company. I asked him about the Christmas party, and he explained his COVID concerns. “Makes sense,” I said, “for you and your company. Any other reasons?” I’ve often found interviewees have a practiced answer to the first question about any topic. He blinked.

“Meanwhile, keeping your personal life hidden exacts a toll on you. You remain awkwardly silent when others talk about their home lives. Anchorage is a small town, and you fear exposure.”

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