Bard College Named Nation's No. 1 Dinner Party School

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Bard College Named Nation's No. 1 Dinner Party School
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ANNANDALE-ON-HUDSON, NY—The Princeton Review announced this week that Bard College has topped its annual ranking of the nation's biggest dinner party schools.

The article quotes students who described the school's rampant "seven days a week" dinner party culture and the widespread popularity of on-campus herb gardening.

"People go crazy here with the dinner parties," said freshman Michael Lee, who claimed he knew about the school's reputation for all-evening-long dinner parties when he applied for admission, but found it even more pervasive than he'd expected. "I've been to dinner parties where guys show up with baguettes under both arms and just go for hours talking about Joanna Newsom or whatever. It's nuts.

Bard administrators said steps in recent years to curb the school's rampant dinner party culture have met with mixed results."The bottom line is that kids here are always going to throw dinner parties," said Mark Halsey, associate dean of Bard College. "No matter how hard we crack down, students will still find a way to get fresh produce from the local farmer's market and make a big garden salad or puree some root vegetables.

Continued Halsey, "That's why we have a strict policy that any student attending a dinner party with more than four courses will be immediately suspended."School officials said Bard has made a number of positive changes since 2005, when a student was sent to the hospital after ingesting in excess of three poached tilapia fillets in less than an hour.

"I've already got three coming up this weekend," said sophomore Marissa Booth, holding up a handmade invitation made from a cut-up black-and-white photocopy of musician Kim Gordon scrawled over in colored pencil. "Although I won't be able to attend Jane's ravioli-making party because of my gluten allergy."

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