Dear Amy: My wife and I have two children, ages three and five. They have started asking about my brother, and we're wondering what to say.
Children at these ages are starting to differentiate between family members, and are especially interested in siblings. In fact, many young children express amazement that their parents were ever children themselves, and that they even have siblings.Tell your kids about your brother, and share positive memories of him from your childhood. Tell stories about some of the things you two used to do together.
Your kids will likely ask what rules he broke, and you can say that he made some bad choices, and didn’t hurt anybody – but he did hurt himself. A few of the older siblings accused some of the younger ones of taking advantage of our parents, and attempted to turn the rest of the family against them. They even went so far as to try and convince long-distance relatives.One sibling’s spouse appears to have a personal grudge against a younger member, and over the years, letters have been written, emails sent, and public comments made, all against the same younger family member.
A few have stated that this will not happen, as they cannot forget the pain of the other siblings with false accusations that they’ve never apologized for.Is it OK to not want a relationship with a sibling if you believe that person has betrayed you?You are an adult and you have the right to have – or not have – a relationship with anyone, including various family members.You are focused on the wrongs done to you and your sibling group .
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