Letter writer is okay with his wife sleeping with another man, but he wonders if he really should be.
About 10 months ago, Linda said, “I've known this man from our West Coast office for a few years. Now he tells me that he can't stop thinking about me in a sexual way. And when he visits our office every three months or so, he wants me to visit him in his hotel. He is crazy about me, but he is a family man and doesn't want our relationship to go beyond his room.”
I think it’s important for you to understand how “Pretty Woman” ends: With Richard Gere clutching flowers in his teeth and climbing a fire escape. My point is that “Pretty Woman” sex can often lead to coffee dates, holding hands at the movies and powerful emotions. Recently his son asked for his father to arrange and pay for their annual beach weekend for the family — that does not include me. When the stepson called to firm up plans, he was on speakerphone and I asked why I was excluded. He said, “You were not included before you married my father four years ago, and I decided to keep it that way.”
It’s challenging to bring a new spouse into the fold. It takes patience but also a firm resolve. It is possible to be sensitive to others’ feelings, without being manipulated by them.
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