Ask Amy: After my boyfriend’s death, I learned he wasn’t the person I thought he was. How do I move on?

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Ask Amy: After my boyfriend’s death, I learned he wasn’t the person I thought he was. How do I move on?
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Advice from Amy Dickinson.

He was my soul mate and stepped in to be the dad in my kids’ lives .He died two weeks ago. Because we weren’t married, I couldn’t be the person to make the arrangements. His mother’s family immediately started blocking me from any involvement in the funeral.He stated that this was because of a past experience he’d had with personal information that was spread online.Well, after his death I had to access his phone in hopes of locating a will, wishes or anything to support getting him put to rest.

I’m talking about pictures, Facebook Messenger, and phone calls spanning the ENTIRE time we were together.How do I grieve the man I was in love with when he was living a double life? Given the way this man’s family rejected and prevented you from participating in the funeral, as well as the evidence you’ve uncovered, you quite naturally feel betrayed.

And now, you must deal with your children in the very best way you can – allowing them to love and mourn this man without focusing on your own anger or his betrayal.

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