Advice | Carolyn Hax: Longtime boyfriend hides their relationship from his parents

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Advice | Carolyn Hax: Longtime boyfriend hides their relationship from his parents
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Advice by Carolyn Hax: Longtime boyfriend hides their relationship from his parents

After several arguments, we finally set a deadline when he would tell them, but as of today he has not. I have dropped a few hints the past couple of days but have not flat-out reminded him. If the deadline comes and goes and he still hasn’t told them, what should I do? By the way, they are not totally oblivious to me. I have met them and they are aware that we are friends.

Instead of establishing consequences without ultimatums, though — the healthy thing — you’ve done the opposite, and made an ultimatum without consequences. You’re asking what to do next, meaning you not only resorted to a threat, but it was an empty one, too — meaning you weren’t honest with him. Most important, you haven’t been honest with yourself.

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