'Interactions with strangers are fraught. I try to be my best self, to be jovial, to be funny, a little sarcastic, and a little sweet. In other words, normal. After an interaction, I obsess and ask, 'Did it go OK? Did I say the wrong thing?''
in 2016 found that 36 percent of women with ADHD meet the criteria for generalized anxiety disorder. Basically, over one-third of us have an anxiety disorder. You can probably relate to my paranoia, to my terror of socializing. You’ve probably been there — and are there.
Part of this, it’s theorized, is that women are much less likely than men to have been diagnosed as children. Children with ADHD have trouble reading social cues. When you grow up this way, you think that everyone is angry at you, or judging you, or ridiculing you. You can’t tell good-natured teasing from mean-spirited taunting. We’re constantly scrabbling around for social footing, constantly on edge. This life of fear brings on social anxiety disorder. I know it. I have it.
I am the same about Facebook posts. First, there are the typos. There are always typos, because I have ADHD and my mind moves faster than my fingers. I can’t see the mistakes I’ve made until it’s too late. They make me look stupid. Then there are the sentiments themselves: Too much? Too little? Did I hashtag correctly? There are so many rules I don’t understand. I don’t get it. When people respond, I don’t get how they’re responding, and that causes more stress.
Most people with ADHD are constantly late. I am if I don’t pay attention. Sometimes I am early — up to half an hour early, because if I am not that early, I will be late, and if I am late, they will think, “Here she is, late again.” I try to bring everything we need, but I inevitably forget something. I have to stop myself from crying in frustration.So I go over lists.
It’s hard to function when you’ve got ADHD and an anxiety disorder. It can be paralyzing. Most of all, it is isolating and depressing. But we women are not alone. We can connect with other women who have ADHD and suffer from anxiety. Find online support groups. Find in-person support groups. Read books. Surround yourself with your sisters in stress. As you do, you might find yourself feeling a little less afraid.
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