A Big Reason Your Teenagers Stop Listening to You

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A Big Reason Your Teenagers Stop Listening to You
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The science behind why your teen is a brat—and how you can better understand their behavior

, or learning disorders. The results showed that the neurobiological shift toward different voices occurred between the ages of 13 and 14, and that there were no differences between boys and girls. The study also found that responses to novel voices in the brain’s reward center increased with age such that the researchers were able to accurately predict how old participants were through the voice-response-specific information on the functional MRI scans.

Teenagers aren’t consciously aware that they’re paying more attention to unfamiliar voices, much less the reasons for it. They just know they want to spend more time with their peers. In the same way that infants become attuned to their mother’s voice as a survival imperative, teens are developmentally drawn to voices that are distinct from their parents as they move toward separating and individuating from them.

So, when your teenage kids aren’t paying attention to what you’re saying, seem to be ignoring you, or are otherwise oppositional, it’s at least in part because they are – literally, in the neurobiological sense — wired to prioritize voices other than your own.

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