Years of research into how couples achieve sexual fulfillment points to some important lessons—like pleasure is not a luxury, but instead should be a top priority
We often feel hesitant to speak up with partners about parts of ourselves that we think they will judge or worry that if we tell them how we truly feel we will hurt them. We tend to play it safe when in doubt. But another way to look at this is that there is a risk to not taking risks. If we don’t explore some of the scarier places with our partners, if we don’t explore the corners of our erotic selves, we tend to shut down and stagnate. And stagnation, itself, is dangerous to relationships.
Wise, N. J., Frangos, E., & Komisaruk, B. R. . Brain activity unique to orgasm in women: An fMRI analysis. The journal of sexual medicine, 14, 1380-1391. Allen, K., Wise, N., Frangos, E., & Komisaruk, B. . Male urogenital system mapped onto the sensory cortex: functional magnetic resonance imaging evidence. The journal of sexual medicine, 17, 603-613.
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